April 30

My new video invitation

Insert Video
Insert Video

Two years ago, on a Tuesday in what was either the first or second week in May 2020, I took myself on a  neighborhood walk.

My simple plan was to get a cup of coffee, pull out my cellphone and spend a few Covid 19 minutes recording the content of Video Blog #1..

My intention was to introduce myself to a new and unknown viewership during what was going to be the first of many Video Blogs that I felt certain would become a core feature of Chez Pa.com experience, the website I was in the early stages of creating…

Then I got home and excitedly turned on the video to review my masterpiece…

And felt totally discouraged…

I had no planned script and in reviewing the quality of the general direction towards which  I had tried to steer my introductory thoughts and comments, I had to objectively admit that the results were a jumbled, rambling and repetitive mess…

I had also impulsively added an ugly sounding musical background soundtrack to first three minutes of a 15 minute video that I couldn’t delete and that contributed nothing to the charm factor I often find myself relying upon whenever my competence is lacking

A few months later then, with Covid settling in for it’s longer than anticipated/hoped for global stay, I tried the introductory video once again…That renewed version, now called “My new video invitation” is viewable on this page, sitting either just above or below this extended blog post, depending of course on my Word Press editing skill…I may need to find myself typically relying on that charm thing once again

Looks like my new new video invitation is above…

and thanks to REV, I was able to use their transcription service to salvage the auditory content of my original 15 minute cup of coffee

 

 

Video blog#1…Thanks to Rev….http://Rev.com

 

Hi guys, I’m Mark…How are you?  

It’s Monday. No, it’s not. It’s Tuesday and I’m in my neighborhood and I decided to take myself out for a walk to go to a place for coffee and then my plan was to get the coffee and over the course of the time that I’m drinking my coffee, I will talk and you guys will listen and then when we get to know each other a little bit better, and then I would introduce myself to you because this is my very first video blog and what I’m doing  written down so far to talk to you guys and tell you what’s on my mind, who I am partly what I want this to be, and so I’ve decided that’s what we’re going to do, and so I don’t know exactly how it’s going to turn out, but in the end I’m just going to get my cup of coffee and see what happen…. That’s what I’m doing right now..

I am Mark, I just turned 61, my birthday is on April the 9th, and so I turned 61 just a week or two ago. And then at the same date, April the 9th, I was born and my mother, Beatrice, was 20 years old, so on April the 9th she turned 20, and I was born on that same date. So we’ve had  our lifetime together forever, and so she’s my mom and she shares a birthday with me. She’s also, then, the grandmother of my daughter, Gwendolyn and she’s also the great-grandmother of my granddaughters, Goodness and Gracious.

That’s just a little bit about me [inaudible 00:02:02] positive part of that [inaudible 00:02:06] version of that [inaudible 00:02:22]. Goodness is my first grandchild and she was born in 2011. So here we’re coming 2020, and Goodness was born in, I think it was in 2011, so she’s going to be nine years old this coming summer she’ll be nine years old. Which is quite a thing at nine years old,  she’s really quite competent and quite good with jumping and running and jumping, skateboarding, all the things that you do when you’re nine. 

And then her sister is Gracious. It’s her birthday, next week, or two weeks from now, and she’s going to be turning eight. No, seven.  Gracious will be turning seven. She was born in 2013, so she’s going to be about seven years old. So seven and nine, that’s the split between the two grandkids, Goodness  and Gracious.

So that’s what I’m here talking about, and that’s what my website is talking about, that experience, the pleasure and the joy and  even, the challenges attending to all that stuff. And I thought that that’s something that was of interest to me to want to pursue, so I’m here to do it. And I just decided that we’re going to have a talk with myself and have my cup of coffee, then give us that amount of time to do it. And I’m talking now and people are looking at me, asking, “What the hell is this guy doing?”

I don’t know, and you don’t know, whether or not we’re just at the beginning of this COVID shutdown stage of things, or if we’re in the middle of it, we’re towards the end of it. We don’t quite know, do we? Because in the end this might be going on for a long bloody time. In that spirit, then, we’re all in isolation, we’re all distancing ourselves in terms of people, and so rather than sitting by a park bench somewhere, I decided to get myself the only cup of coffee place I could find, which is the local gas station, I knew did Tim Hortons, so I went there to get a… I walked to the gas station in order to go in and get a takeout cup of coffee so I could have this video moment with you guys, so I can introduce myself to you and you guys can at least get a sense of my face, at least get a sense of my voice, get a sense of my choppy deliver in that charming, I hope, that way.

So in that spirit that I’m introducing myself to you that visual way, because in the end, you will also, when you go to my website, which is called Chez Pa , when you go there, then I’ve written down some of the things I’m trying to say here now, just as I’m rambling here. I’ve written it down a little bit more eloquently, a little bit more structure, but with a bit  more of a sense of… It’s not quite as choppy, it’s a little bit more deliberate. I could edit it along the way, so if it was getting too long winded, I could redo it and rework it again and edit the spelling and the punctuation, blah blah.

So in that spirit then, when you leave this moment with me and you want to go and see who I am and read who I am and read what I have to say, then you can also go to my website, which is at Chez Pa.com

                             Let me explain that to you a little bit then, because I call myself Pa because then, here’s the deal, Goodness, who’s my oldest grandchild, she was learning to talk blah blah, and in the end… At that time Goodness was living with us. She was living with me and her Nan and in the end, Gwen, her husband Ben my daughter, was with us, and we were all living together because they were buying a house and they were getting ready to buy their house. And then also Gracious was going to be born, so Gwen was pregnant with Gracious.

So Goodness was living with us, not far from here, quite frankly, and then we lived together all for a full year, and that full year then, among the things that we did together was Goodness ended up going to her local daycare and in going to her local daycare, then she was just learning to talk and just learning how to do whatever, because she was only two years  old, a year and a half years older than her sister, and then she was introducing me to her friends as her Pa, because in the end, I guess she had a bit of a hard time understanding grandpa or whatever she was trying to say about who I was. But her friends ended up cluing into the fact that I was Paul. They used to say, “Hi, Paul. How are you, Paul? How are you, Paul?” So anytime I went to the daycare, which was on a daily basis, or pretty well, then I was almost getting ready to say, “Hi, Paul, hi Paul.” And I said, that’s cute. That’s funny. It’s weird.

But in the end that stuck. I thought, well I’m not Paul, I’m Pa, then that sort of turned out to be what that was. And then I liked that and in the end it worked out well, because in the end, if I was going to be Pa, that meant then there was full berth, there was no sense of boundary issue. If all of a sudden my dad, who was going to now be great-grandpa, and Harold, who’s going to be grandpa, then there was a grandpa and a great-grandpa and a Pa, so all of a sudden nobody was tripping over each other in terms of who was going to get called grandpa, because in the end, when I was growing up, my father was grandpa, and I guess when anybody else was growing up, Harold has always been grandpa too, so we couldn’t have three grandpas. It would be totally confusing to everybody. Never mind confusing me too.

So then when Goodness decided to call me Pa, Paul, Pa, and I said, “Yes, let’s do that then.” And then my father could be great-grandpa without any kind of a competition from me or any sense of boundary issue and confusion for Goodness and then her grandpa, who was Harold, that he got full run of that label too, and everything worked out easily from there. So that’s my little story in terms of why it turned into Pa. And I just like that, because I’m the only Pa that I know, and in the end then I’m the only Pa that Goodness knows, and as it turns out, I’m the only Pa that Gracious knows too, because in the end everybody calls me Pa, so what the hell? And so that’s where that sits. That’s where that comes from. It’s uncomplicated but it’s certainly at least that fancy. And that’s my story.

That’s part of what this experience has been for me, just having to get a bit of a sense of newness. And as I’m talking to you here now, I’m realizing, for example, part of what I like about being a grandfather, part of what I like about having grandkids, I’ve only got the two, I’ve got Goodness and I’ve got Gracious, but I’ve got two. And in the end then you see lots of… Everything’s new.. .It’s all new. This is my first video blog here, I’ve never done this before. And I can tell myself I’m nervous and I’m not necessarily as eloquent as I’d like to be, and perhaps I’m not impressing myself as much as I’d like to impress myself, but here I am doing it.

But it’s new, and in the end I’m working on a blog, a regular blog, at the house, and that’s new for me too. And I’ve just finished my first year of retirement. I’ll be finishing my first year of retirement June the 1st, so I’ve only been retired for a little bit of time and that’s all new to me as well. So new and new and new. And for the girls then new and new and new is every freaking day of their life, there’s something new and new and new. And that’s a lovely, charming thing to be privy and attuned to, because in the end, if you’re seeing that everything that they do is new and they’re getting good at something or they’re learning something or they’re just struggling, it’s all brand new. That’s a very fascinating place to be. It’s developmentally significant to watch newness play itself out and getting to be be a supportive person in their newness journey, because in the end everything they’re doing is new, a new taste, a new whatever, anything that you might want to engage with newly, it’s happening right now in real time.

In real time, when I’m doing this real time, first time doing this, and conversely then Goodness and Gracious are both doing real time this or that, and their stories are very eloquent and very charming and very real and very true. And in that spirit, then, when you watch that, when you get into that, when you just allow that to be, and you grow with that too, then you can really appreciate it and you can be charmed by it. It can bring you down to a sense of what is important, because in the end, the vulnerability and the… What’s the word I’m looking for? Not vulnerability, but… There’s a word I’ve lost here. Sometimes I lose a word at this age of the game.(Innocence?)

But when there’s a newness to it, your experience has a certain charm to it too, and it’s something you can’t forget about at all. It’s a very interesting thing. So that’s what might be something I might do a little bit more of a research, a little bit more of a sense of focus, perhaps deliberate sense of treatise on newness and what that play in terms of grandfathering and how that’s new to people and how their grandkids’ newness is of interest and how that’s something you can share in common. And so they’ve got new things, I’ve got new things, blah, blah, there’s a calm now that we can perhaps engage or just know, at least just acknowledge, just a referencing to affirm that I’m new and you’re new, I don’t know it all, you don’t know it all, let’s learn it together, or whatever, something like that.

When there’s frustrations, well, how do we share our frustrations? How do we manage our frustrations? So these are teaching moments for me and learning moments for them, or whoever, whatever, we’re all learning and teaching each other at the same time. And we’re helping each other. When we have our own easy’s, we have our own hard’s, and we’re just trying to make some sense of the best we can, and not running away or not avoiding or not saying no, and just keep on going and not expecting to be perfect every time, my goodness, but at least to be in the game, to be part of having a day which is your day to have, so have it, enjoy it.

That’s part of my thinking on that, so I’ll give that a little bit more reflection. I might even put that in writing somehow, someway, when I maybe have a blog moment when I’m back at the house, but that’s just a mental note for myself now.

In the end, that’s what I’m doing here now. I’ve been at this now for 11 minutes, which is pretty good, so what I want to do is I want this to be my first template, if you will, I’ve had my coffee, I said to myself, I’ll get myself a cup of coffee’s worth of time, and after that, I’d say, okay guys, see you later, and then I thought I’d walk myself home. But in the end now I’m 11 minutes in and now my coffee’s got halfway to go, and what I’m going to say to you now is that the next person I’m going to pass this off to is my dad. Because my dad… I told you my mother, that I was born on her birthday, and so she’s 81 and I’m 61, so she’s 20 years to the day older than I am. And my dad, then, Peter, he will be 82, I think, so he’ll be 82 in July, and so I mentioned my next intention is to pass this video blog task off to my dad.

He’s got a phone, I’ll say, “Dad, do what I’ve done and take so many minutes of your time. Go get yourself a cup of coffee and then talk into the phone and tell the world about you and yourself, and then give a little bit of a feedback to people listening to you  about your experience of being a grandfather.”

And when my dad does that, he’s going to say, “Well, I’ve got, whatever, I’ve got so many grandkids.” He’s got way more than I’ve got, and then beyond that, he’s got a bunch of grandkids and great-grandkids. So he has got five or six or seven, eight, grandkids, I don’t even know the number anymore, and then beyond that, he’s got a whole whack of great-grandkids then too. So in that spirit then, he’s going to have a lot to say too. So this is me doing my thing, granddad number one, Pa, and then great-granddad, Peter, granddad, number two in this exercise, I’ll pass the baton off to my dad to do his version of this then too. So me and then my dad and then after my dad is done… He’ll do his video, he’ll send it to me somehow, I’ll do YouTube, I’m not sure what, but I’ll put it onto my blog page anyway.

And then, get ready for this, I’m going to go over to Harold. Because Harold then is Goodness’ paternal grandfather, because in the end, Harold is Ben’s father. I am Gwen’s father, Gwen, and I am Goodness and Gracious’ grand dad, maternal granddad, and Harold then is their paternal granddad, because he’s Ben’s father. So that was easy to understand, right? And so I will go from me to Peter, and then from Peter then we’ll go to Harold, and that will be one, two, and three of us. We’ll kickstart this sense of Che Pa, the Che Pa website thing in terms of what it’s all about.

Then I’m going to suggest this is the beginning and I’m having a cup of coffee to make this have a sense of starting somewhere. I’m into it for four 14 minutes now, that’s probably getting close to being long enough, because I’ll lose your attention if I wait too much longer. But then I’ll say that this is my plan just to pass it on to Peter, and then to put this video onto my webpage. And then the next time that I see you, I’ll have done this again, probably with another cup of coffee along the way. But in the meantime, I’ll probably try and get my dad, Peter, and my father-in-law, grandfather in-law guy, Harold, to do his thing then too. I don’t know what my relationship to Harold is supposed to be called. My co-granddad? I’m not quite sure. But he’s granddad number three, and that’s my little order of things here too.

So it’s Pa and great-grandpa and grandpa… after that I’ll make a new plan, because I have no idea who else I’m going to get involved in this. It might be a lot of people. They might be lining up to try and do this thing then too, because it’s the COVID time, so I can’t go and see them just now, they got to sort their own thing. It’s five minutes to go. Five seconds to go. That’s it. That’s good enough for now, okay guys? Hope you enjoyed it. Whatever. …I’m doing my best…. Talk to you later. Bye-bye.  Pa.  Bye-Bye…

something that was of interest to me to want to pursue, so I’m here to do it. And I just decided that we’re going to have a talk with myself and have my cup of coffee, then give us that amount of time to do it. And I’m talking now and people are looking at me, asking, “What the hell is this guy doing?”

I don’t know, and you don’t know, whether or not we’re just at the beginning of this COVID shutdown stage of things, or if we’re in the middle of it, we’re towards the end of it. We don’t quite know, do we? Because in the end this might be going on for a long bloody time. In that spirit, then, we’re all in isolation, we’re all distancing ourselves in terms of people, and so rather than sitting by a park bench somewhere, I decided to get myself the only cup of coffee place I could find, which is the local gas station, I knew did Tim Hortons, so I went there to get a… I walked to the gas station in order to go in and get a takeout cup of coffee so I could have this video moment with you guys, so I can introduce myself to you and you guys can at least get a sense of my face, at least get a sense of my voice, get a sense of my choppy deliver in that charming, I hope, that way.

So in that spirit that I’m introducing myself to you that visual way, because in the end, you will also, when you go to my website, which is called Chez Pa , when you go there, then I’ve written down some of the things I’m trying to say here now, just as I’m rambling here. I’ve written it down a little bit more eloquently, a little bit more structure, but with a bit  more of a sense of… It’s not quite as choppy, it’s a little bit more deliberate. I could edit it along the way, so if it was getting too long winded, I could redo it and rework it again and edit the spelling and the punctuation, blah blah.

So in that spirit then, when you leave this moment with me and you want to go and see who I am and read who I am and read what I have to say, then you can also go to my website, which is at Chez Pa.com

                             Let me explain that to you a little bit then, because I call myself Pa because then, here’s the deal, Ava, who’s my oldest grandchild, she was learning to talk blah blah, and in the end… At that time she was living with us. She was living with me and her Nan and in the end, Gwen, my daughter, was with us, and we were all living together because they were buying a house and they were getting ready to buy their house. And then also Sophie was going to be born, so Gwen was pregnant with Sophie.

So Ava was living with us, not far from here, quite frankly, and then we lived together all for a full year, and that full year then, among the things that we did together was Ava ended up going to her local daycare and in going to her local daycare, then she was just learning to talk and just learning how to do whatever, because she was only two years  old, a year and a half years older than her sister, and then she was introducing me to her friends as her Pa, because in the end, I guess she had a bit of a hard time understanding grandpa or whatever she was trying to say about who I was. But her friends ended up cluing into the fact that I was Paul. They used to say, “Hi, Paul. How are you, Paul? How are you, Paul?” So anytime I went to the daycare, which was on a daily basis, or pretty well, then I was almost getting ready to say, “Hi, Paul, hi Paul.” And I said, that’s cute. That’s funny. It’s weird.

But in the end that stuck. I thought, well I’m not Paul, I’m Pa, then that sort of turned out to be what that was. And then I liked that and in the end it worked out well, because in the end, if I was going to be Pa, that meant then there was full berth, there was no sense of boundary issue. If all of a sudden my dad, who was going to now be great-grandpa, and Harold, who’s going to be grandpa, then there was a grandpa and a great-grandpa and a Pa, so all of a sudden nobody was tripping over each other in terms of who was going to get called grandpa, because in the end, when I was growing up, my father was grandpa, and I guess when anybody else was growing up, Harold has always been grandpa too, so we couldn’t have three grandpas. It would be totally confusing to everybody. Never mind confusing me too.

So then when Ava decided to call me Pa, Paul, Pa, and I said, “Yes, let’s do that then.” And then my father could be great-grandpa without any kind of a competition from me or any sense of boundary issue and confusion for Ava, and then her grandpa, who was Harold, that he got full run of that label too, and everything worked out easily from there. So that’s my little story in terms of why it turned into Pa. And I just like that, because I’m the only Pa that I know, and in the end then I’m the only Pa that Ava knows, and as it turns out, I’m the only Pa that Sophie knows too, because in the end everybody calls me Pa, so what the hell? And so that’s where that sits. That’s where that comes from. It’s but it’s certainly at least that fancy. And that’s my story.

That’s part of what this experience has been for me, just having to get a bit of a sense of newness. And as I’m talking to you here now, I’m realizing, for example, part of what I like about being a grandfather, part of what I like about having grandkids, I’ve only got the two, I’ve got Ava and I’ve got Sophie, but I’ve got two. And in the end then you see lots of… Everything’s new.. .It’s all new. This is my first video blog here, I’ve never done this before. And I can tell myself I’m nervous and I’m not necessarily as eloquent as I’d like to be, and perhaps I’m not impressing myself as much as I’d like to impress myself, but here I am doing it.

But it’s new, and in the end I’m working on a blog, a regular blog, at the house, and that’s new for me too. And I’ve just finished my first year of retirement. I’ll be finishing my first year of retirement June the 1st, so I’ve only been retired for a little bit of time and that’s all new to me as well. So new and new and new. And for the girls then new and new and new is every freaking day of their life, there’s something new and new and new. And that’s a lovely, charming thing to be privy and attuned to, because in the end, if you’re seeing that everything that they do is new and they’re getting good at something or they’re learning something or they’re just struggling, it’s all brand new. That’s a very fascinating place to be. It’s developmentally significant to watch newness play itself out and getting to be be a supportive person in their newness journey, because in the end everything they’re doing is new, a new taste, a new whatever, anything that you might want to engage with newly, it’s happening right now in real time.

In real time, when I’m doing this real time, first time doing this, and conversely then Ava and Sophie are both doing real time this or that, and their stories are very eloquent and very charming and very real and very true. And in that spirit, then, when you watch that, when you get into that, when you just allow that to be, and you grow with that too, then you can really appreciate it and you can be charmed by it. It can bring you down to a sense of what is important, because in the end, the vulnerability and the… What’s the word I’m looking for? Not vulnerability, but… There’s a word I’ve lost here. Sometimes I lose a word at this age of the game.(Innocence?)

But when there’s a newness to it, your experience has a certain charm to it too, and it’s something you can’t forget about at all. It’s a very interesting thing. So that’s what might be something I might do a little bit more of a research, a little bit more of a sense of focus, perhaps deliberate sense of treatise on newness and what that play in terms of grandfathering and how that’s new to people and how their grandkids’ newness is of interest and how that’s something you can share in common. And so they’ve got new things, I’ve got new things, blah, blah, there’s a calm now that we can perhaps engage or just know, at least just acknowledge, just a referencing to affirm that I’m new and you’re new, I don’t know it all, you don’t know it all, let’s learn it together, or whatever, something like that.

When there’s frustrations, well, how do we share our frustrations? How do we manage our frustrations? So these are teaching moments for me and learning moments for them, or whoever, whatever, we’re all learning and teaching each other at the same time. And we’re helping each other. When we have our easy’s, we have our hard’s, and we’re just trying to make some sense of the best we can, and not running away or not avoiding or not saying no, and just keep on going and not expecting to be perfect every time, my goodness, but at least to be in the game, to be part of having a day which is your day to have, so have it, enjoy it.

That’s part of my thinking on that, so I’ll give that a little bit more reflection. I might even put that in writing somehow, someway, when I maybe have a blog moment when I’m back at the house, but that’s just a mental note for myself now.

In the end, that’s what I’m doing here now. I’ve been at this now for 11 minutes, which is pretty good, so what I want to do is I want this to be my first template, if you will, I’ve had my coffee, I said to myself, I’ll get myself a cup of coffee’s worth of time, and after that, I’d say, okay guys, see you later, and then I thought I’d walk myself home. But in the end now I’m 11 minutes in and now my coffee’s got halfway to go, and what I’m going to say to you now is that the next person I’m going to pass this off to is my dad. Because my dad… I told you my mother, that I was born on her birthday, and so she’s 81 and I’m 61, so she’s 20 years to the day older than I am. And my dad, then, Peter, he will be 82, I think, so he’ll be 82 in July, and so I mentioned my next intention is to pass this video blog task off to my dad.

He’s got a phone, I’ll say, “Dad, do what I’ve done and take so many minutes of your time. Go get yourself a cup of coffee and then talk into the phone and tell the world about you and yourself, and then give a little bit of a feedback to people listening to you  about your experience of being a grandfather.”

And when my dad does that, he’s going to say, “Well, I’ve got, whatever, I’ve got so many grandkids.” He’s got way more than I’ve got, and then beyond that, he’s got a bunch of grandkids and great-grandkids. So he has got five or six or seven, eight, grandkids, I don’t even know the number anymore, and then beyond that, he’s got a whole whack of great-grandkids then too. So in that spirit then, he’s going to have a lot to say too. So this is me doing my thing, granddad number one, Pa, and then great-granddad, Peter, granddad, number two in this exercise, I’ll pass the baton off to my dad to do his version of this then too. So me and then my dad and then after my dad is done… He’ll do his video, he’ll send it to me somehow, I’ll do YouTube, I’m not sure what, but I’ll put it onto my blog page anyway.

And then, get ready for this, I’m going to go over to Harold. Because Harold then is Ava’s paternal grandfather, because in the end, Harold is Ben’s father. I am Gwen’s father, Gwen, and I am Ava and Sophie’s grand dad, maternal granddad, and Harold then is their paternal granddad, because sees Ben’s father. So that was easy to understand, right? And so I will go from me to Peter, and then from Peter then we’ll go to Harold, and that will be one, two, and three of us. We’ll kickstart this sense of Che Pa, the Che Pa website thing in terms of what it’s all about.

Then I’m going to suggest this is the beginning and I’m having a cup of coffee to make this have a sense of starting somewhere. I’m into it for four 14 minutes now, that’s probably getting close to being long enough, because I’ll lose your attention if I wait too much longer. But then I’ll say that this is my plan just to pass it on to Peter, and then to put this video onto my webpage. And then the next time that I see you, I’ll have done this again, probably with another cup of coffee along the way. But in the meantime, I’ll probably try and get my dad, Peter, and my father-in-law, grandfather in-law guy, Harold, to do his thing then too. I don’t know what my relationship to Harold is supposed to be called. My co-granddad? I’m not quite sure. But he’s granddad number three, and that’s my little order of things here too.

So it’s Pa and grandpa and great-grandpa and after that I’ll make a new plan, because I have no idea who else I’m going to get involved in this. It might be a lot of people. They might be lining up to try and do this thing then too, because it’s the COVID time, so I can’t go and see them just now, they got to sort their own thing. It’s five minutes to go. Five seconds to go. That’s it. That’s good enough for now, okay guys? Hope you enjoyed it. Whatever. …I’m doing my best…. Talk to you later. Bye-bye.  Pa.  Bye-Bye…

 


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